When we’re trying to make our case, to explain, to get through, the chances are good that we’re competing with noise in the listener’s head.
What assumptions did they hold before you ever started speaking? What concerns are they dealing with that have nothing to do with you?
The thing that made this really clear to me was talking to our puppy. When she knows I have a treat for her, she is fully focused on me, and she understands what I want. When we’re outside, and there are a million smells and sights, sometimes she can’t even hear my voice.
We’re not so different from the puppy. When the person we’re listening to has something we think is beneficial for us, it’s easier to block distractions out and truly listen. When we have a lot going on, what we’re listening to is complex, or both, it can be harder to really comprehend the idea.
We owe ourselves and our ideas the space to be heard as they are, not partially listened to and fractionally understood. Especially when we’re describing something new, something complex, or something nuanced, we have to be ready to explain it in several different ways to break through the noise. And it helps to remind ourselves that other people have more going on in their heads than just our words.
