Failure and Practice

The moments of recognition of failure are the practice. Sam Harris, a neuroscientist and teacher of meditation, shared that thought. It resonates with me because even though Harris was talking about meditation, he could be referring to any skill we hope to acquire. When your mind is wandering during meditation, you don’t know that your …

Being Good at It Is More Fun

It’s more fun to already be good at it, whatever it is.  Riding a bike, playing the guitar, sound editing…we want to be able to do it like we’ve seen others do it, effortlessly, gracefully, efficiently.  But getting there is hard work, most of it behind the scenes. And that hard work isn’t always fun. …

When Your Default Intention Becomes Your Personality

We all have times when our default intention takes charge.  Something happens, and that default intention kicks in. We need to defend ourselves, to prove we’re right, to prevent failure, to let them know they’re wrong, to hide, to make waves, to be heard…the list goes on. But what happens when the fear-based, default reaction …

Why Is That Chair There?

Make the furniture work for you.  A lot of people take the arrangement of furniture in a conference room or auditorium space for granted, like it put itself there. Most likely, it was either left that way by the people in the room before you, or a team of people arranged it according to a …

Why I Smile First

When I’m meeting with a coaching client, I usually use my own Zoom platform, and I have the waiting room function enabled.  When their name pops up at the top of the window, letting me know they’ve arrived, I smile. I smile as I click the button to let them in, before they can see …


Have you ever been the in the audience when a speaker, after greeting the crowd and getting a tepid response, says: “Oh, I know you can do better than that. Good morning!”  I had never thought much about it, but the subject came up recently after a friend shared that it bugs her when speakers …

What Do We Choose to Remember?

The most basic definition of a memorial is that it’s something that exists to remind us of a person or an event. Many of us have personal memorials—objects or photos or books or even places that we keep in our lives in order to help us think about people or times past.  These are some …

The Tangles of Our Own Making

Our sweet dog, Rhodie, has a little problem with hyper-vigilance. Someone walking down the street near our house? ALERT! Guy next door getting out of his car? THIS IS A PROBLEM ! Neighbor’s dog frolicking in his own yard, minding his own business? GET HIM! As a result, Rhodie has to be on a long leash …

Your Own Personal Billboard

Our faces are our billboards to the world. They are telling the people around us how we’re feeling, whether it’s okay to approach us, what kind of person we are, whether we’re paying attention, what we think about the person who’s talking right now. This is even more true in a virtual environment. Since all …

A Few Words About Introverts and Extroverts

“Introvert” and “extrovert” are words we love to throw around to describe ourselves and other people. But as with so many personality traits, using these terms as a general catch-all can do a real disservice to both types of folks and everyone in between. As I discuss in the video below, introversion and extroversion refer …

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