What should we do when our mood is at odds with our intention? We know that we need to focus on the long-term impact of our communication. We know that getting frustrated or irritated won’t advance our cause.
But we’re only human. We get annoyed, we get tired of running into the same obstacles, and frankly some days we just don’t feel like combatting our default intention. We’re not in the mood.
I’ve been there! And I have a couple of thoughts to share. First, be honest with yourself if you find you’re just not up to doing the work of intentional communication right now. Identify your default intention, and give it a name.
Recognize that you’re going to hang out in that mood, that default intention, for a while. Sit with it. Feel what it feels like in your body. Listen to the inner monologue that comes with these feelings. Dive into it and swim around.
If you’re with other people while all this is going on, try to communicate neutrally. Just hold the fort until you can show up in a way you’ll feel good about. If you can, take a break until the mood passes.
Second, remember that moods are like weather. This is going to blow over, and you’ll feel better and more equipped to rise to the occasion next time. Be forgiving of yourself! Everyone has these days.
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