My daughter and I were talking this week about how hard it can be to start something you know will be difficult. Okay, we were talking about exercising.
She said, “There are days when it’s fun, but often it’s just a slog. How do you make yourself do it when it’s just going to be hard? What’s the reward?”
I couldn’t bring myself to say what I know is true–the Slog is present in so many areas of life (nearly all of them, really.) And I didn’t want to parrot the advice that often comes up in relation to this topic, things like “find joy in the process” and “hard work is its own reward.” It’s not that those sayings aren’t true, but that I think there’s more truth to be found in grappling with the Slog as it is, no cheery reframing applied.
The Slog is the Slog. It may be a workout you don’t like or a school project you have to do, cleaning out the attic or filing your taxes. The Slog shows up over and over, at work and at home.
It’s natural to prefer some activities over others, and to think “I wish this were over.” You don’t have to find a way to embrace it, to make the Slog your friend. But you can’t avoid it. You have to find a way to get through the Slog regardless.
I learn a lot about myself when I do things I don’t want to do. I watch myself put it off, resist doing it, bargain, then begin. I see myself start, notice I’m starting, wonder when I can stop. Is this something I can get someone else to do? Can I quit early?
Then somewhere in the middle, I notice that I’ve stopped wondering when I can stop. I see that I’ve made some progress. I congratulate myself. (This immediately makes the whole process start over again.) But after a few minutes, I’m back in the flow, and soon I’m finished, or at least finished for now. The Slog is over.
You may find, as I have, that choosing the Slog over and over again brings a familiarity with this process. I might be preparing a presentation or filing the stacks of papers in my office, but my way of navigating it is the same. I can move more quickly through the bargaining and resistance phases, to get to doing the thing. I’ve found a certain pride in my ability to show up and gut it out. (That said, if I never had to deal with taxes again, that would be just fine.)
How do you navigate the Slog?
